Getting Back To It

Morning all.

It’s been a while since I did some proper text-based writing. I’ve got a few thoughts I wanted to get out there that have been using up space on the NOTES section of my phone. It is a wonder I can form a coherent thought at all anymore without having first jotted it down externally. Having said that Dumbledore’s Pensieve worked so as to free up more brain for braining. Maybe the knowledge that I don’t have to keep an active tab on these things anymore frees me up to think of other utter nonsense to then put on another note. It’s a vicious cycle.

So here are some other half-baked ideas:

Goolugy – A eulogy whereby your Google searches are read out. Whether this is a good idea or not I don’t know but it has a great name!

Belvita advert – Watch this advert: 

Now compare it to this:

The first ad, whilst terrible, is very localised to the UK. Which required some serious effort and time to sum up all British people (thuggish radio presenter) and link them to a British breakfast (Sausage McMuffin thing) and then once you’ve identified as that to make you look like the apes at the start of Space Odyssey finding the monolith (biscuit rubbish). The second ad is very easy to send to every country in the world and dub over with different lyrics. This suggests the breakfast market in the UK needed that much more attention to break into than everywhere else (I imagine the French ate that rubbish right up… probably for breakfast. Au revoir croissant dipped in a bowl of Nesquik). Those dubbed over adverts have an almost repellent effect on me though. Normally the dub is so bad as to make the viewing experience either confusing or so removed from reality that I can’t visualise my life with the product. So the logic must be that the savings made from making one ad and dubbing over it in all of your market’s languages must be less than the sales lost from people like me who don’t like the look of your product because of the bad ad… but that just can’t be right. I mean look at this:

Maybe the French, in response to having the croissant and Nesquik markets snuffed out overnight, just wanted to annoy me. But seriously? Having watched that do you feel Renault gives a damn about your connection to the product? TL;DR – Surely it is worth the effort to localise all your adverts no matter the cost otherwise people think you don’t care enough to advertise at them properly.

Glade rock air freshener – (before I start I had this on my phone as Ambi Pur rock air freshener so I guess that says something about their brand power). Remember this travesty? 

The idea is that the apparently abhorrent sight of your normal air freshener cannot be abided anymore and must be disguised amongst your… collection of rocks. But surely you need to have numerous designs for this to work otherwise people will now recognise your “rock” as the air freshener they saw in that god-awful advert. For this idea to truly work you would need to NOT advertise your PLETHORA of different air freshener designs and take smug delight in the fact that your vapid, stupid friends could NOT in fact detect your air freshener. But then that’s not point is it? Now get out your wallets!

Thanks for reading.

-Norris